This is a full safety plan that you can print off and keep.
If you have experienced or are experiencing bullying, this is a plan to help you stop the bullying and be safe again. It will give you ideas about who can help you and how to get help, and practical things that you can do which may help you to avoid being bullied.
Tell somebody
If you are being bullied it is really important that you tell someone. If you have already managed this and are working on this safety plan with the person that you have told, well done. But keep reading for ideas about who else can help you and how they can help you if you let them know what is happening.
Things that might stop you telling
You might be scared that the bullying will get worse if the people doing it find out that you have told someone. This doesn’t have to be true. Nobody needs to know that it was you who reported the bullying and if you don’t tell anyone about it, it is likely to get worse because the person or people bullying you will think that they can get away with it.
Maybe you reckon that nobody can do anything to help? This isn’t true either, and you have a right to get help to put a stop to the bullying.
People who bully rely on you being too afraid to tell anybody about the bullying and may threaten you to stop you from telling, or say that nobody will believe you or help you. Don’t believe them. If they are bullying you, they are not your friends and do not have your best interests at heart, so why should you trust them? Especially when they are trying to stop you doing something about their bullying.
People who can help, how they can help and ways to tell them
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People that you live with
Bullying can have a big effect on how you feel and this can change the way that you act at home. If they don’t know what is causing you to act that way, this can make the people that you live with worried about you, confused and sometimes angry. If you tell them what is going on, they will understand why you’re acting the way you are, stop being angry and confused and support you and help you to stop the bullying and talk to teachers and/or youth workers and anyone else, if necessary.
People at home that you might want to tell could include your parent(s) or carer(s), brothers and sisters, other friends and relations that you live with, or a neighbour. If the bullying is happening at school or at a youth club, somebody from home could help you talk to the staff there about stopping it. You might want to bring up the subject of bullying by asking if they have ever been bullied themselves. You’d be surprised how many people have been bullied when they were younger. -
Friends
A lot of people get bullied – usually when they are children or young adults and often when they are at school. Being bullied can make people feel very lonely. It is a good idea to tell a friend what is happening, if you can. They can give you support in talking to others about the bullying, and may stick up for you, which can help to discourage the people doing the bullying. It’s a good idea to choose a quiet moment to tell a friend about what is going on. Again, asking if they’ve ever been bullied or if they know anyone who has been bullied can be a good way to raise the subject. -
Teachers, youth workers, etc.
Schools and Pupil Referral Units have a legal duty to protect their pupils from bullying. All staff – including teachers, lunchtime supervisors, school nurses, school counsellors, caretakers and office staff – have a duty to listen to young people when they tell them about bullying, and to take them seriously. If you are being bullied at school, talk to a teacher or other member of staff that you trust. If you are worried about being seen talking to a teacher, you could pretend that you need to stay after class to talk to them about work and then tell them about the bullying once other pupils have left the room. If you are scared about the bullying getting worse because you have told, let the teacher know this so that they can make sure it doesn’t happen.
If the bullying is happening at a youth club, you should tell a youth worker or volunteer about it. They will be able to help you stop it. Again, it is a good idea to try and speak to them in private. Going to see them in the office, or when they are having a break can be a good way to do this.Other adults who can help and who you might want to tell include staff at your doctor’s surgery, mentors, social workers, Connexions personal advisers, speech therapists and learning support workers.
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The police
If the people bullying you are stealing your money or possessions, harassing you with bullying text messages or emails, threatening you with physical or sexual assault or if you have been assaulted, DON’T BE AFRAID TO CONTACT THE POLICE. In an emergency, call them on 999.Physical and sexual assault, theft and text and email harassment are all serious offences and if the people bullying you are doing any of these things then the police can help you to stop it.
What if you’re not ready to tell someone face to face?
You could try writing a note to someone at home, a friend, a trusted teacher, or a youth worker. You could leave an unsigned note giving details of the bullying in the school, PRU or youth club office, or your school or PRU may have a Bully Box where you can post a note about the bullying that you are experiencing.
If you need help and advice, but are not yet ready to talk about the bullying face to face with somebody who knows you, you can call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to speak with a counsellor who will be able to offer you encouragement and support, suggest ways to get help and go through your options with you. ChildLine is a free telephone number, so you don’t need to pay to call it, and you can speak to a counsellor 24 hours a day.
What details should you give about the bullying?
The most important thing is just to tell someone that you are being bullied. However, the more you can tell about the bullying the more information the person that you tell has to help you stop it. Details that will help them are:
- Where and when you are being bullied.
- How you are being bullied (this might be physical bullying or the threat of it; name calling; deliberately excluding you from games and activities; sending hurtful, threatening or insulting text messages, etc.)
- Who is bullying you (you don’t have to give this information, but if you do it will make it easier for the person that you tell to help stop the bullying).
- Who, if anybody, witnessed the bullying, including who, if anybody, stuck up for you or encouraged the bullies (again you don’t have to give this information, but it can help).
- Any evidence of bullying (e.g. damaged property and/or clothing, copies of nasty e-mails, phone and text messages, notes/letters, etc.).
